Elton John, Funeral Whore, to Sing at Michael Jackson’s Service

Michael Jackson Magick Sandwich

Thursday evening, Elton John paid tribute to Michael Jackson at his annual White Tie and Tiara Ball, dedicating his song “Don’t Let the Sun Go Down on Me” to the dead pop star.

Few people know that Jackson was working on his own version of Elton’s classic, tentatively titled “Please Let Your Son Go Down on Me.”

At the ball, John also dedicated “Candle in the Wind” to Jackson, a song originally written about Marilyn Monroe then retooled for Princess Diana.

Rumor has it that Sir John is working on a web-based funeral ballad generator, which fans could use to plug in a dead pal’s vital statistics and emerge with a ready-made eulogy in song.

Elton John Magick SandwichOf course, Elton would receive a royalty for every performance. For an undisclosed fee, Elton will show up at a funeral and throw himself on the coffin. Photos, of course, cost extra.

Elton remains undecided as to which song he will perform at Michael Jackson’s funeral, where he expects a spectacular turnout.

He is reportedly working on finishing Jackson’s version of “Please Let Your Son Go Down on Me” though he is also said to be combing his thesaurus to find a word for pedophile that rhymes with candle.

Related post:
Elton John, Wedding Whore, Sings at Rush Limbaugh’s Wedding

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13 replies
  1. kathcom
    kathcom says:

    Thanks, I decided to take your advice and claim the joke.

    A friend on Facebook just reminded me I made up that version of the Elton John song back in the early 90's.

    There's a whole verse but some of it would have to be updated now. I remember crooning it to many friends back in the day.

    I guess I haven't changed.

    Reply
  2. kathcom
    kathcom says:

    @Herman: You have an altar? I'm so flattered! Wait, that doesn't mean I have to die soon, does it?

    @Chris: Here's a taste of the rest of the song. "…cuz when I touch myself,it's his little face I see…" Yes, shame on me indeed.

    Reply
  3. SPACE LOVER
    SPACE LOVER says:

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    Reply
  4. kathcom
    kathcom says:

    @Space Lover: I checked out your sites and didn't see any mention of charities anywhere. But I'll take your word for it. Are you sure you want to use Magick Sandwich for publicity?

    Reply
  5. kathcom
    kathcom says:

    @PhilipDyer: Finally, Sir Elton has done something for me, and I'm not even dead yet.

    I'm on my way to collect my award. And may I suggest another tune from Elton's repertoire to use at Jacko's service–Brown Dirt Cowboy?

    Reply
  6. Anonymous
    Anonymous says:

    Hey! I have been thinking precisely the same thing… did he sing at Swayze's or Stephen Gately's, or McQueen's… or Versace's? He seems to be mates with all these goners… hmmmm

    Reply

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