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Faith Reconsidered
I believe for every drop of rain that falls, a flower grows. But not a new flower per drop, of course. That would be a doomsday scenario for the human race, pretty flowers choking out all life as we know it. Except possibly bees.
Superfluity
When seeing your proctologist, a breath mint is probably unnecessary.
Useless Revelation #1
I paid my dues, but I was in the wrong club.
Angelina Jolie, Beautiful Freakshow
When did Angelina Jolie go from being an S&M-crazed, goth bisexual to a beaming earth mother? Is this a sign of the apocalypse? She’s already taking Maddox to buy knives! (Not that there’s anything wrong with that if you’re into cutlery. Jolie’s mother bought her knives and look how great she turned out.) And she […]
Hindsight
You know what would be really sad? Lying dead in the morgue wearing a nicotine patch.
7 Good Band Names
Every once in a while, a random neural misfire results in an excellent name for a band. Since I lack the talent or volition to form one, I share the fruits of my daydreams with you. Discount Buddha Fugue State Phantom Booger Pharm Animals Soylent Greenpeace Knuckle of Dung I also like Buzz Slaw, which […]
Why I Don’t Need the Gym
I exercised my right to vote. I might have pulled a muscle so I’m letting it heal. Can’t be too careful.