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Magick Sandwich

Sandwich Fixins #6

Once again I find myself a few (magick?) sandwiches short of a picnic. So I offer you the condiments of my mind with another helping of Sandwich Fixins.

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When you order Domino’s online, you can post your order to Facebook. As technological solipsism reaches its zenith, can the apocalypse be far behind?

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My dream job would be to work in a think tank at Arm & Hammer, coming up with new ways to market baking soda.

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When I need to feel smart, I read a message board—any message board. The writers’ streams of consciousness read more like comatose trickles.

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How many bars of soap could be made from the rendered fat of Rush Limbaugh?

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When did “gift” become a verb? “The star was gifted the necklace after the photo shoot.” Wasn’t she given the necklace?

When did “shone” disappear? For example, “The star shined at the opening.” I don’t understand. Was she polishing something?

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I saw Karl Rove in person, so I can cross “be in the presence of evil” off my bucket list.

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If you feel that any of my jokes require a little help, add your own percussion with Instant Rimshot.

More fixins:
Sandwich Fixins #3
Sandwich Fixins #4
Sandwich Fixins #5

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